24.04.24

Äîáðî ïîæàëîâàòü íà ñàéò êëàíà "Holy Knights" , ïåðâîãî êëàíà Ïîñëåäîâàòåëè Ïîâåëèòåëÿ Ìåòàëëà ìåòàëëèñòîâ "Áîéöîâñêîãî Êëóáà".

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Ñàéò Ñâÿòûõ Ðûöàðåé :: Ôîðóìû :: Áîéöîâñêèé Êëóá :: Þìîðèñòàì - ñþäà ;-)
 
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Ìîäåðàòîðû: Áîðîâè÷åê, Crazy_Orient, METIS, Ðûæàÿ âåäüìà, Swolf
Àâòîð Äîáàâèë
Ñèãìà
Sun 20 Jan 2008, 01:43AM
Ãîñòü
 , à ÷òî íå + Ï-È-Ö-Î-Ò ? , êñòàòè òîæå ïîäõîäèò ñëîâå÷êî =)
Íàâåðõ
Áîðîâè÷åê
Mon 21 Jan 2008, 11:48AM
 




ID ïîëüçîâàòåëÿ #299
Çàðåãèñòðèðîâàí: Wed 23 Mar 2005, 02:44PM
Ìåñòîíàõîæäåíèå: Ýñòîíèÿ
Ñîîáùåíèé: 1448
 Ðàíüøå ìóæ÷èíû ïðè âñòðå÷å ñíèìàëè øëÿïû. À òåïåðü âûòàñêèâàþò èç óõà íàóøíèê...
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Äâà ïðàêòèêàíòà â âåòèðèíàðíîì ó÷èëèùå äåðæàò ñîáàêó, îäèí ñìîòðèò åé â ðîò, äðóãîé ïîä õâîñò:
- Òû ìåíÿ âèäèøü?
- Íåò, à òû ìåíÿ?
- Òîæå íåò!
- Âñå ÿñíî, çàâîðîò êèøîê
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- À ìåíÿ â÷åðà ñîáàêà ïîêóñàëà!
- Áåøåíàÿ?
- Íåò, íîðìàëüíàÿ. Ñòàë áû ÿ áåøåíóþ çà õâîñò äåðãàòü!
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Êíèãà ðåêîðäîâ Ãèííåñà ïîïàëà â êíèãó ðåêîðäîâ Ãèííåñà, êàê êíèãà-ðåêîðäñìåí ïî êîëè÷åñòâó ðåêîðäîâ Ãèííåñà â îäíîé êíèãå.
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- Âû ìåíÿ ñ êåì-òî ïóòàåòå! ß Ñêóáè-Äó! Ñêóáè-äóáè-äó-ó-ó-ó! - çàãîëîñèëà ïñèíà â ïîäòâåðæäåíèå ñâîèõ ñëîâ.
Ãåðàñèì íå ñëûøàë. Îí áûë ãëóõîíåìîé.
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Búåçæàåò ãðóçîâèê â äåòñêèé ñàä. Øîôåð, ïîäïðûãèâàÿ íà ìåñòå îò òðÿñêè, ãîâîðèò:
- Hå äåòè, à êàìíè êàêèå-òî!

Êîãäà òû ãîâîðèøü, ñëîâà òâîè äîëæíû áûòü ëó÷øå ìîë÷àíèÿ.
Íàâåðõ
Áåíâîëèî
Mon 21 Jan 2008, 08:18PM
Ãîñòü
 Áîð...è îòêóäà â òåáå ñòîëüêî þìîðà ))))))))
Íàâåðõ
Áîðîâè÷åê
Tue 22 Jan 2008, 12:00AM
 




ID ïîëüçîâàòåëÿ #299
Çàðåãèñòðèðîâàí: Wed 23 Mar 2005, 02:44PM
Ìåñòîíàõîæäåíèå: Ýñòîíèÿ
Ñîîáùåíèé: 1448
 ß ñûí ïåòðîñÿíà :)
Êîãäà òû ãîâîðèøü, ñëîâà òâîè äîëæíû áûòü ëó÷øå ìîë÷àíèÿ.
Íàâåðõ
Áîðîâè÷åê
Mon 28 Jan 2008, 10:32AM
 




ID ïîëüçîâàòåëÿ #299
Çàðåãèñòðèðîâàí: Wed 23 Mar 2005, 02:44PM
Ìåñòîíàõîæäåíèå: Ýñòîíèÿ
Ñîîáùåíèé: 1448
 Ïî èññëåäîâàíèÿì ìîëäàâñêèõ ó÷åíûõ, áîëüøå âñåãî âèòàìèíîâ ñîäåðæèòñÿ â àïòåêàõ.
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Ìîé êîò ÷àñòî ãàäèò ïî óãëàì, ÿ åãî çà ýòî ëóïëþ.
Ìíå êàæåòñÿ, ÷òî îí äóìàåò, ÷òî ÿ åãî ëóïëþ çà òî, ÷òî îí ìàëî ãàäèò.
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Ïðèêèíü, êàê òÿæåëî áóäåò ñëåäóþùåìó ïîêîëåíèþ! Çàõî÷åøü ãäå-íèòü çàðåãèòüñÿ, à âñå ëîãèíû óæå çàíÿòû!!!
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Êíÿæåñòâî Ëèõòåíøòåéí ïðèñòóïèëî ê âûâîäó ñâîåãî ñîëäàòà èç Èðàêà.
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- Ãäå áûë?
- Õîäèë çà àäðåíàëèíîì.
- Ñåìå÷êè ó ãîïíèêîâ îòíèìàë ÷òîëè?
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Çàíÿòèÿ ôèãíåé íà ðàáî÷åì ìåñòå ðàçâèâàþò áîêîâîå çðåíèå, ñëóõ è áäèòåëüíîñòü â öåëîì.
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Îí áûë íåâåçó÷èì íàñòîëüêî, ÷òî äàæå â òóàëåòíîé áóìàãå ñ àðîìàòîì ïåðñèêà åìó ïîïàäàëèñü êîñòî÷êè.
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Ïëîõàÿ ïðèìåòà åõàòü â ìàøèíå... íî÷üþ... â ëåñ... â áàãàæíèêå...
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Òåððîðèñòû çàõâàòèëè â çàëîæíèêè àâòîáóñ ñ ÿïîíñêèìè òóðèñòàìè.
 ðàñïîðÿæåíèè ïîëèöèè èìååòñÿ áîëåå 100000 ôîòîãðàôèé çàõâàò÷èêîâ.
Êîãäà òû ãîâîðèøü, ñëîâà òâîè äîëæíû áûòü ëó÷øå ìîë÷àíèÿ.
Íàâåðõ
Ñèãìà
Mon 11 Feb 2008, 07:37AM
Ãîñòü
 , Ñ Áàøîðãà.ru


xxx: âîò íå ïîíèìàþ ÿ... â÷åðà áûë â ïëàòíîì òóàëåòå, è òàì ðÿäîì ñ ïèñóàðàìè åñòü íà ñòåíå òèïà äâåðöà ìàëåíüêàÿ, êàê øêàô÷èê... âîò íàôèãà îíà ïðèêëååíà ñêîò÷åì ê ñòåíå è íà íåé êðàñóåòñÿ íàäïèñü ìàðêåðîì "ÍÅ ÎÒÊÐÛÂÀÒÜ"???????
xxx: êñòàòè çà äâåðöåé îêàçàëñÿ ïðîñòîé âîäîïðîâîäíûé êðàí è âñå)))
xxx: åëå îáðàòíî äâåðöó ïîñòàâèë - îíà âñÿ ðàçäîëáàííàÿ))

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Shamane:
à òî ÿ ìèññèþ ïðîøåë, èãðàòü íåâ÷åãî
Dan:
çà çëî
Dan:
èëè çà äîáðî?
Shamane:
êîíå÷íî çà äîáðî =)
Dan:
òðÿïêà
Shamane:
ó äîáðîé äåâêè ñèñüêè áîëüøå áûëè
Dan:
ïðîùåí

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[Kinetic] Ìû íà ïðîøëîé íåäåëå íîâîñåëüå ñïðàâëÿëè. Íà ñëåäóþùèé äåíü î÷íóëñÿ â òóàëåòå â îáíèìêó ñ óíèòàçîì.
[Kinetic] Ñòàë ðàññïðàøèâàòü äðóçåé ÷òî æå áûëî.
[Kinetic] À îêàçàëîñü íè÷åãî íå áûëî. Ïðîñòî ÿ, åùå íå îñâîèâøèñü ñî ñâîèì íîâûì òóàëåòîì, ïîøåë ïîñðàòü è ñåë ìèìî óíèòàçà. Ñòóêíóëñÿ áàøêîé îá ñòåíêó è îòêëþ÷èëñÿ.
[Kinetic] Ïî ðàççêàçàì äðóçåé î òîì, ÷òî âûòàùèòü ìåíÿ èç òóàëåòà èì íå äàë äîìîâîé, ÷óâñòâóþ èì áûëî âåñåëåå ÷åì ìíå :'(

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Íàâåðõ
Áîðîâè÷åê
Tue 12 Feb 2008, 10:23AM
 




ID ïîëüçîâàòåëÿ #299
Çàðåãèñòðèðîâàí: Wed 23 Mar 2005, 02:44PM
Ìåñòîíàõîæäåíèå: Ýñòîíèÿ
Ñîîáùåíèé: 1448
 ß òàê ìíîãî ÷èòàë î âðåäå àëêîãîëÿ è êóðåíèÿ, ÷òî ñ Íîâîãî ãîäà ðåøèë áðîñèòü.
- ×òî èìåííî: ïèòü èëè êóðèòü?
- ×èòàòü.
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Êîâðèê äëÿ ìûøêè âûïîëíèë íåäîïóñòèìóþ îïåðàöèþ è áóäåò ñâåðíóò.

Êîãäà òû ãîâîðèøü, ñëîâà òâîè äîëæíû áûòü ëó÷øå ìîë÷àíèÿ.
Íàâåðõ
abu
Sun 17 Feb 2008, 08:29PM
Ãîñòü
 âñåì ïðèâåò
àëêîãîëèê ïàäàåò ñ êðûøè è âîâ âðåìÿ ïîëåòà îí ïðîñèò áîãà:
-Ãîñïîäè ïîìîãè ìíå, åñëè ÿ óïàäó è íåóìðó ÿ áðîøó ïèòü!
Êîðî÷å îí ãðîõíóëñÿ íî íå ïîìåð.
Âñòàåò ðàäîñòíûé. Ïîñìîòðåë íà ñåáÿ, âðîäå áû âñå öåëî. Ïîáëàãîäàðèâ áîãà, ïðî ñåáÿ ñêàçàë ÿ æèâîé. Åòî íàäà îòìåòèòü. È ïøåë ñíîâî â áàð.
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Äâå ïîäðóãè îäíà äðóãóé:
-Áåäíûé, áåäíûé ìîé ìóæ.
-×òî ñ íèì?
-Îí è â ñàìîì äåëå áåäíûé.
Íàâåðõ
Áîðîâè÷åê
Wed 16 Apr 2008, 10:36AM
 




ID ïîëüçîâàòåëÿ #299
Çàðåãèñòðèðîâàí: Wed 23 Mar 2005, 02:44PM
Ìåñòîíàõîæäåíèå: Ýñòîíèÿ
Ñîîáùåíèé: 1448
 È ìîâèë áîãàòûðü Çìåþ Ãîðûíû÷ó:
- Âûõîäè, ÷óäèùå ïîãàíîå!
È îòâåòèëî ÷óäèùå ïîãàíîå:
- Êîíå÷íî! Ìíå êàê ðàç íà ñëåäóþùåé âûõîäèòü =)
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Ñàìûé ñòðàøíûé ïðîòèâíèê â äðàêå – ñïîðòñìåí-áåãóí.
Åñëè òû ñèëüíåå, òû åãî íå äîãîíèøü, åñëè ñèëüíåå îí, îò íåãî íå óáåæèøü.
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Ïðîïàë áîëüøîé ÷åðíûé äèïëîìàò. Hàøåäøèõ ïðîñèì âåðíóòü åãî â ïîñîëüñòâî Hèãåðèè.
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- Çàïîðîæåö íóæíî âîäèòü òðåìÿ ðóêàìè!
– Íå ïîíÿë, à çà÷åì?
- Îäíîé äåðæèøüñÿ çà ðóëü, âòîðîé – çà êîðîáêó ïåðåäà÷, à òðåòüåé âûòèðàåøü ñë¸çû!
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Îáúÿâëåíèå: Èíòåëëèãåíòíàÿ ñåìüÿ ïðîäàñò äâóõ ôîðòåïüÿíîâ è îäíó ðîÿëþ. Ìåøàþòñÿ â êàëèäîðå...
Êîãäà òû ãîâîðèøü, ñëîâà òâîè äîëæíû áûòü ëó÷øå ìîë÷àíèÿ.
Íàâåðõ
Áîðîâè÷åê
Thu 24 Apr 2008, 03:12PM
 




ID ïîëüçîâàòåëÿ #299
Çàðåãèñòðèðîâàí: Wed 23 Mar 2005, 02:44PM
Ìåñòîíàõîæäåíèå: Ýñòîíèÿ
Ñîîáùåíèé: 1448
 - Òû ÷òî ñåãîäíÿ âå÷åðîì äåëàåøü?
- Íè÷åãî. ß ïèòü áðîñèë.
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 òþðüìå. Ïðîâåðÿþùèé ñïðàøèâàåò çàêëþ÷åííîãî:
- Ïî÷åìó âû çäåñü?
- Äà âèäèòå ëè... Êàê âàì ñêàçàòü...
- Òàê è ñêàæèòå, ïî÷åìó âû çäåñü???
- Äà ïîòîìó ÷òî íå ÂÛÏÓÑÊÀÞÒ!!!
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Ó÷åíûå ñêðåñòèëè Ìàéêëà Äæåêñîíà è Àãíèþ Áàðòî. Ñóùåñòâî ïîäìàíèâàåò äåòåé ñòèõàìè....
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1 Ìàÿ – Ïðàçäíèê òðóäà. À ïî÷åìó â ýòîò äåíü íèêòî íå ðàáîòàåò?
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Íàøà êîøå÷êà òîæå ñíà÷àëà íå ëþáèëà ïûëåñîñ, à ïîòîì íè÷åãî - âòÿíóëàñü.
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Êîãäà òû ãîâîðèøü, ñëîâà òâîè äîëæíû áûòü ëó÷øå ìîë÷àíèÿ.
Íàâåðõ
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Çàðåãèñòðèðîâàòüñÿ...


bullet Swolf
05 Aug : 17:17
05.08.2023 onder:
bullet MAORI
14 Sep : 05:04
Æèâûõ íåò?)
bullet Swolf
12 Nov : 19:57
Êàê âñ¸ çàïóùåíî...
bullet MAORI
05 Jan : 13:14
Áûë òóò )
bullet Swolf
30 Dec : 20:27
Ïðèâåò áðàòâà! Âñåõ ñ íàñòóïàþùèì Íîâûì Ãîäîì!!!
bullet METIS
23 Apr : 00:04
Õàé, ß òóò áûë
bullet ×åìïèîíêà
28 Oct : 14:47
Óðà! Ïîëó÷èëîñü! ß òîæå òóòà÷êè áûëà)))
bullet Swolf
30 Sep : 01:51
Ãëóõîìàíü
bullet MAORI
25 Sep : 00:42
Áûë òóò)
bullet Swolf
11 Apr : 23:14
êó
bullet MAORI
01 Apr : 06:15
Áûë òóò )
bullet METIS
25 Dec : 23:02
Äðàñüòå
bullet Áîðîâè÷åê
27 Oct : 15:47
Óðà óðà, ÿ òåïåðü ñ ïàðîëÿìè è ìîãó òóò ïèñàòü :)
bullet Swolf
21 Oct : 13:35
bullet MAORI
17 Oct : 04:56
Ïîçäðàâëÿþ ïåðñîíàæà LoneWolf_E [10] ñ âîçâðàùåíèåì â Êëàí !


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